Entry # 19 Punctuation Exercise: Otto

Just forget it, my friend, forget it, and let me introduce myself first, my name is Otto Dietrich zur-Linde, and I would like to be understood; I want to tell my story so that those who come after me won’t suffer the same horrible destiny as I did, I’ll tell you what my destiny was afterwards, and yes, I already know, years will not erase every track or print of my existence, so let my case be trivial, but, till then, till then I’ll speak; yes indeed, sir, I’ve got two extreme passions, music and the metaphysics, both of which have helped me overcome tough times, of great sadness, and two great masters, Arthur Schopenhauer and Johannes Brahms, have influenced me deeply with their marvelous work since I was a little boy, a boy born in Essen, close to Dortmund and Duisburg, on August the 31st, around the year 1897, two years before Adolf was born, and incorporated to the Nationalsozialistische Deutsche Arbeiterpartei in 1929, because I believed, as all of us suffered German people believed, that this was the beginning of new times, that a new type of men was to be born, and besides, I could notice I was living during a time of big change, like the time of Jesus and the time of Mohamed, but now they are going to execute me for being a killer and torturing dozens of Jews, but it was not me who killed them, I just gave the orders to others, and I did not see a human in a Jew, but I saw all that was bad for the German people in them, and this, we all believed it, but for me it was terribly difficult because never before was I a violent man, and on the present day it is still true that I have never used or seen an execution; I do not feel guilt, and that’s why I do not seek being forgiven, but I understand that history condemns losers, and we got the loss this time, we proved the world that arrogance is the right path towards self destruction, and I do not regret anything, regretting would have no use, my friend, because I am satisfied with loss, because our loss is an end and I am tired; it satisfies me because it has occurred, because it is tied to all the facts that were, that will be, and censuring o blaspheming a single action is denying the universe, and because Adolf believed fighting for a country, but he fought for everyone, even for those he harmed, it doesn’t matter, it is not important that Adolf himself did not know this, his blood and his will knew it, what do I care if Germany was destined to be the anvil and the rest of the world be the hammer! If victory and justice and happiness was not meant to be for us, then at least let it be for other nations, let heaven exist, for Christ’s sake, even though I belong in hell, my friend, my skin and flesh may have fear, I do not.