The officers were pretty confused with the entire situation and how Lourdes had made a big deal out of nothing. In the other hand, my mother couldn’t avoid letting out a huge laugh.
“No ma’, it was just a joke, they aren’t taking me anywhere. Relax, relax.” “Oh! Thank God, Ruby, you almost gave me a heart attack!” Both laughed again, the officers as well. I still think they are a bit confused with what happened, but, they laughed at the end.
But their laugh was different from my mother’s laugh. They got the ‘Polite Laugh’. On the other hand, my mother got the ‘Nervous Laugh’. That is the laugh you get when you are watching a suspense movie, you are waiting for something to happen, and you are somehow very nervous. You also get that specific laugh when you get frightened by someone hiding behind a door and the guy yells “Boo!” suddenly and unexpectedly. First, you jump because of fear and then you laugh. The other person also laughs nervously as they see you jump in fear.
These events’ main cause is poor communication. There are other examples of these events that have occurred at Lourdes’ and Carol’s house. One night, Carol, Fernando my brother, Carol Jr., and I were sitting at the T.V. room watching TVEspañola. Carol Jr. is my mother’s oldest brother. He was sitting at a rocking chair beside his dad, and Fernando and I were sitting at a sofa behind them, all facing the T.V. Carol Jr. had a tray on his thighs that had his dinner plate full of meat and potatoes.
He was eating like a caveman. He put huge pieces of potatoes and meat in his mouth. Strange sounds came out of his mouth as he chewed the food down with his mouth half open. He ate as if the world was going to end the next day. For about two seconds, Carol, Fernando, and I stared directly at him, amazed. Fernando noticed, by a strange expression in my grandfather’s face, that my grandfather was not at all happy with the way Carol Jr. was eating because he got distracted and couldn’t watch TVEspañola. Fernando read my grandfather’s mind, and said: “He’s eating.” Just to pull Carol’s string and see if he would come up with a funny response. “He’s eating.” Carol said and nodded. Carol Jr. didn’t look at any of us and didn’t seem to know we were staring at him.
“Hey, son, where is your wife?” my grandpa added to get his son’s attention. “Meat and potatoes,” Carol Jr. answered with his mouth full of food. It was hard to understand what Carol Jr. said when he spoke normally, and this time, with his mouth full and the incoherent answer, it was harder to decipher what he tried to say. By the look on my grandfather’s face, I noticed he didn’t understand what his son had answered, but he was trying hard to do so.
There were a few seconds where Carol just starred at Carol Jr., trying to figure out what the answer was. Fernando and I did understand what happened and what Carol Jr. had said. He was so busy eating he didn’t listen to his father’s question and didn’t mind to give a good answer. A misunderstanding had been created.
“What?!” Carol asked his son. “Meat and potatoes,” Carol Jr. mumbled a little bit clearer, but still, really difficult to understand. “She’s at ‘The Potato?” asked Carol. He had a huge confusion. “What?” Garbled Carol Jr. Meanwhile, Fernando and I started laughing at the whole situation. Both Carols looked back at us wondering what we were laughing about. We cleared things out for them. My grandfather put his upper lip over his lower lip, looked at his son, and moved his head from left to right.
viernes, 28 de marzo de 2008
Revision #1
My grandparents live in an old, big, and dirty house. Since it is so big and since they are old, they cannot take care of it by themselves. It is a custom, in Cartagena, and most of South America, to have maids, and employees that help you do your house chores. My grandparents have seven different workers. Each of them, stranger and more peculiar than the other.
Hannibal is my grandparent’s house guard. He arrives every night and leaves in the morning. Hannibal has twisted his leg three times. He twisted his leg three times getting of a public bus that drops him off a block away from my grandparent’s house.
“He loves getting off moving buses. He is so ignorant he does not know that when the bus has stopped, it is safer to get off. He just jumps off the bus while it running at 90 miles per hour, as they are used to here in Cartagena, since the driver is a bigger monkey than Hannibal, and obviously, he ends up screwing up his leg.”
That is Carol’s theory. “It would be better if it occurred once and then he learned the lesson, but it has happened three times. It is too hard for me to understand that kind of things. How can that happen? Is it that he loves breaking and twisting his legs? You see? This town is full of crazy people. I believe a trained dog, or a trained monkey could get off the bus without twisting their legs. They do not even have to be trained. ”
There’s an even stranger story. Strange things happen in Cartagena. Hannibal, one of the times he broke his leg, he had to get a surgery. He was operated. He started his recovery sessions. A few days later, he started feeling something weird in his leg. He had been noticing his leg was not going through a normal recovery. He went back to the doctor to check it out. He had to get an x-ray. When he received the x-ray back, he discovered the surgeon had accidentally left his scalpel inside Hannibal’s leg. This story was fascinating for my grandfather because it proved one of his theories that says Cartagena is full of ignorant people.
“What would you expect from a monkey making a surgery on another monkey’s leg? A complete mess. A complete disaster. You should expect the same from that surgeon making a surgery on Hannibal’s leg. You cannot judge who is worse, either Hannibal who likes jumping off buses, or the surgeon who leaves his tools inside the patient! That is the way this town is. One incoherence after the other. It is endless, never ending.”
At least Hannibal was smart enough to place a demand on the surgeon, and, at least, he won the case. Fortunately. “At least his case was not a total circus, where gorillas and dogs play like most things are in this town. No, at least his case was handled professionally and he got what he deserved. Imagine what had happened if another gorilla handled the case? What kind of craziness would have happened? You see?”
Hannibal is the reincarnation of Mike Tyson, or a gorilla. “The same thing, either Mike Tyson or a gorilla, they’re exactly the same. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. They’re exact.” Carol says every time we chat about Hannibal. “They all have no brains. The only difference between Hannibal and the other two is that Hannibal died long time ago. Even though you see him walking in and walking out of the house, day after day, he is already dead. He is a zombie. That is what I have concluded by his actions. That would be the only answer to why he never speaks, or to why you can never understand what he mumbles with his exaggerated tone of voice or to why he has always got his eyes closed. How can someone walk, watch T.V., or eat with their eyes completely shut? He’s a zombie! That is why he walks the way he does, and that is why he has the strength he has. He has the strength of a dead man.”
“But Grandpa, how did Hannibal die?” I would ask Carol just to see and listen what kind of answer he would invent. “Look, son, the answer is pretty obvious. He died doing what he likes the most. Jumping off moving buses.”
My grandfather’s capacity to come up with very elaborate, detailed, and creative answers in just a second is amazing. It would take someone hours to come up with such an answer, but for Carol, it is plain instinct, a reflex. He always surprises everyone. That’s why I do those types of questions. You see, Carol is like those type of toys that have a string, and when you pull it, they talk to you, or make a little dance, or laugh, anything. Asking Carol those questions would be the same as pulling a toy’s string.
Hannibal is my grandparent’s house guard. He arrives every night and leaves in the morning. Hannibal has twisted his leg three times. He twisted his leg three times getting of a public bus that drops him off a block away from my grandparent’s house.
“He loves getting off moving buses. He is so ignorant he does not know that when the bus has stopped, it is safer to get off. He just jumps off the bus while it running at 90 miles per hour, as they are used to here in Cartagena, since the driver is a bigger monkey than Hannibal, and obviously, he ends up screwing up his leg.”
That is Carol’s theory. “It would be better if it occurred once and then he learned the lesson, but it has happened three times. It is too hard for me to understand that kind of things. How can that happen? Is it that he loves breaking and twisting his legs? You see? This town is full of crazy people. I believe a trained dog, or a trained monkey could get off the bus without twisting their legs. They do not even have to be trained. ”
There’s an even stranger story. Strange things happen in Cartagena. Hannibal, one of the times he broke his leg, he had to get a surgery. He was operated. He started his recovery sessions. A few days later, he started feeling something weird in his leg. He had been noticing his leg was not going through a normal recovery. He went back to the doctor to check it out. He had to get an x-ray. When he received the x-ray back, he discovered the surgeon had accidentally left his scalpel inside Hannibal’s leg. This story was fascinating for my grandfather because it proved one of his theories that says Cartagena is full of ignorant people.
“What would you expect from a monkey making a surgery on another monkey’s leg? A complete mess. A complete disaster. You should expect the same from that surgeon making a surgery on Hannibal’s leg. You cannot judge who is worse, either Hannibal who likes jumping off buses, or the surgeon who leaves his tools inside the patient! That is the way this town is. One incoherence after the other. It is endless, never ending.”
At least Hannibal was smart enough to place a demand on the surgeon, and, at least, he won the case. Fortunately. “At least his case was not a total circus, where gorillas and dogs play like most things are in this town. No, at least his case was handled professionally and he got what he deserved. Imagine what had happened if another gorilla handled the case? What kind of craziness would have happened? You see?”
Hannibal is the reincarnation of Mike Tyson, or a gorilla. “The same thing, either Mike Tyson or a gorilla, they’re exactly the same. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. They’re exact.” Carol says every time we chat about Hannibal. “They all have no brains. The only difference between Hannibal and the other two is that Hannibal died long time ago. Even though you see him walking in and walking out of the house, day after day, he is already dead. He is a zombie. That is what I have concluded by his actions. That would be the only answer to why he never speaks, or to why you can never understand what he mumbles with his exaggerated tone of voice or to why he has always got his eyes closed. How can someone walk, watch T.V., or eat with their eyes completely shut? He’s a zombie! That is why he walks the way he does, and that is why he has the strength he has. He has the strength of a dead man.”
“But Grandpa, how did Hannibal die?” I would ask Carol just to see and listen what kind of answer he would invent. “Look, son, the answer is pretty obvious. He died doing what he likes the most. Jumping off moving buses.”
My grandfather’s capacity to come up with very elaborate, detailed, and creative answers in just a second is amazing. It would take someone hours to come up with such an answer, but for Carol, it is plain instinct, a reflex. He always surprises everyone. That’s why I do those types of questions. You see, Carol is like those type of toys that have a string, and when you pull it, they talk to you, or make a little dance, or laugh, anything. Asking Carol those questions would be the same as pulling a toy’s string.
miércoles, 26 de marzo de 2008
Entry # 15 The Jew Drinker
“How can this be possible? Is there really someone as evil, nasty, disgusting and despicable?” James yelled to the floor and waved his arms emotionally. “Why man? What the hell happened? Who are you talking about?” Johnny asked James. “Yeah bro, this guy, that despicable creature, Evan. I can’t believe he said that.“Is that the little white guy that lives two blocks away?”“Yeah bro.”“What did he say man? What do you mean?”“He said, he said he loves drinking Jews. I am not even a Jew, but bro, that, I can’t stand.”“Drinking Jews?”“Yeah bro. Can you believe that?”“No I can’t man.”“Its true bro, he loves drinking them with brown sugar.”“Brown sugar? Its unbelievable man, I mean, I can’t believe it. It’s impossible to believe.”“This type of comments make me lose my temper, make me lose my mind! Make me lose control bro!”“What is up with Evan? Who does he think he is with those types of comments?”“Who? Ah!? Who? He’s despicable, Johnny, despicable!”“Let’s go find him man.”“Find him?”“Yeah, find him. Man, you’ve got listening problems.”“Yeah sure, let’s go to his place, its two blocks away, bro.”“I’ll get my bat, man.”“Ok, bro, then I’ll be Robin.”“What do you mean you’ll be Robin?“You just said you’ll be Batman!”“Batman? What I said was I was going to look for my bat.”“Ah yes, your bat, bro. Take it. Swing it at Evan’s head.”
Both Johnny and James walked to Evan’s house. Johnny held his enormous aluminum bat. When they arrived, James knocked on the door, aggressively.
“Hey, man, what if you misunderstood? What if it wasn’t him who likes drinking Jews, but it is someone else, and Evan was just repeating his words, man?” Johnny asked doubtfully.“Bro, then let’s ask him.”“Ok man, you’ll ask him.”
Two seconds later, Evan opened the door, with a glass of reddish, brownish liquid. “Hey, its J and J, how are you guys doing? What brings you around? Please come in.”“Yeah yeah, whatever Evan. Bro, do you like drinking Jews?” James asked Evan. “Drinking juice?”“Yeah yeah, dinking Jews, bro, are you drinking one right now?”“What’s the big deal James?”“Just answer me you little white something.”“Yes I do, especially with brown sugar, are you happy now?”“Happy?” Both James and Johnny said.
Then, James and Johnny exchanged a look, which basically meant ‘go ahead’.“That’s it for you Evan!” Johnny said while he swung his bat aiming at Evan’s little white head. Fortunately for Evan, he ducked just in time and Johnny’s bat missed and ended up hitting James on the chest and knocking him out.“Hey, what is your problem brother?” Evan screamed.“I JUST KNOCKED OUT MY MAN, JAMES!” Johnny was in shock, and worried for his man’s health. He put his bat down as he got on his knees to get a closer look at James. Simultaneously, Evan picked up the bat and swung it at James, hitting him on the back of the head, knocking him out, too.
Both Johnny and James walked to Evan’s house. Johnny held his enormous aluminum bat. When they arrived, James knocked on the door, aggressively.
“Hey, man, what if you misunderstood? What if it wasn’t him who likes drinking Jews, but it is someone else, and Evan was just repeating his words, man?” Johnny asked doubtfully.“Bro, then let’s ask him.”“Ok man, you’ll ask him.”
Two seconds later, Evan opened the door, with a glass of reddish, brownish liquid. “Hey, its J and J, how are you guys doing? What brings you around? Please come in.”“Yeah yeah, whatever Evan. Bro, do you like drinking Jews?” James asked Evan. “Drinking juice?”“Yeah yeah, dinking Jews, bro, are you drinking one right now?”“What’s the big deal James?”“Just answer me you little white something.”“Yes I do, especially with brown sugar, are you happy now?”“Happy?” Both James and Johnny said.
Then, James and Johnny exchanged a look, which basically meant ‘go ahead’.“That’s it for you Evan!” Johnny said while he swung his bat aiming at Evan’s little white head. Fortunately for Evan, he ducked just in time and Johnny’s bat missed and ended up hitting James on the chest and knocking him out.“Hey, what is your problem brother?” Evan screamed.“I JUST KNOCKED OUT MY MAN, JAMES!” Johnny was in shock, and worried for his man’s health. He put his bat down as he got on his knees to get a closer look at James. Simultaneously, Evan picked up the bat and swung it at James, hitting him on the back of the head, knocking him out, too.
Entry # 14 Carol 12
Several weeks later, Carol, Lourdes, Fernando, Sergio, and me were all sitting at the T.V. room. We sat on a similar way, but this time, Lourdes was occupying the rocking chair were Carol Jr. sat the last time. Also, this time Sergio was sitting in the sofa with Fernando and me.
We were talking about a friend of ours called Carlos, and we asked Carol to call him just to say hi and make him laugh. So, Carol got his cell phone out and his tiny phonebook where he keeps millions of phone numbers and that makes a contrast with Carol’s enormous hands and fingers. Carol dialed a number and put the cell phone to his ear, but he accidentally dialed the wrong number and called Carol Jr., who is located below Carlos in the tiny phonebook.
“Hello, who is this?”Carol Jr. asked. “This is Carol Rumie, who am I talking to?” My grandfather answered. “No, I am Carol Rumie, who am I talking to?” Carol Jr. answered, he didn’t know it was his father, and Carol Sr. didn’t know it was his son. “Ah! Are you trying to play a joke on me? Who is this? I am Carol Rumie, not you.”“This is not funny, I am Carol Rumie, now, please tell me who this is. If this is a joke, it is the most lame, @#$%^&*+ joke I’ve ever heard!!” Carol Jr. answered angrily.“You can’t be Carol Rumie, I am Carol Rumie.” Amazingly, my grandfather kept a cool temper and his son was the most altered. “OH MY GOD!”
Meanwhile, the rest of us in the room had a terrible abdominal pain of laughing so hard since we had good common sense and predicted that Carol had called his son, Carol Jr.“Lourdes, come and listen to this guy who claims he is Carol Rumie.” My grandfather finally told his wife.“Noooo, jajajaja, ‘Mono’, it is Carol Andres Rumie, your son! JAJAJA!” Lourdes cleared things out.“Aaaaah, ‘mijo’ hello.”“Pa’, is that you? I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t know you had a cell phone.”“Yeah it is me, your nephews gave it to me.”“Ah O.K. say hi to ma’, see you pa’.”
It is very funny to look at my grandfather speak on the phone, because he loses temper very quickly. Normally, he speaks two or three words on the phone, short conversations. His most frequent three words are ‘Who is this?’
I call Carol’s house to speak with Lourdes or any of the workers, rather than speaking with Carol. When you call that house, most frequently, Lourdes would answer the phone. It’s a big surprise hearing Carol’s voice answering. I remember a common Thursday about nine years ago. I was about seven years old, I was eating at my grandparent’s house, and my cousin Rodrigo was trying to reach me. He was about six years old. He dialed the number, and Carol answered the phone, and automatically, Rodrigo put the phone down, he was scared of speaking to Carol. Most of my friends, at that age, were afraid of speaking to Carol, since he is so grumpy. They felt intimidated.
We were talking about a friend of ours called Carlos, and we asked Carol to call him just to say hi and make him laugh. So, Carol got his cell phone out and his tiny phonebook where he keeps millions of phone numbers and that makes a contrast with Carol’s enormous hands and fingers. Carol dialed a number and put the cell phone to his ear, but he accidentally dialed the wrong number and called Carol Jr., who is located below Carlos in the tiny phonebook.
“Hello, who is this?”Carol Jr. asked. “This is Carol Rumie, who am I talking to?” My grandfather answered. “No, I am Carol Rumie, who am I talking to?” Carol Jr. answered, he didn’t know it was his father, and Carol Sr. didn’t know it was his son. “Ah! Are you trying to play a joke on me? Who is this? I am Carol Rumie, not you.”“This is not funny, I am Carol Rumie, now, please tell me who this is. If this is a joke, it is the most lame, @#$%^&*+ joke I’ve ever heard!!” Carol Jr. answered angrily.“You can’t be Carol Rumie, I am Carol Rumie.” Amazingly, my grandfather kept a cool temper and his son was the most altered. “OH MY GOD!”
Meanwhile, the rest of us in the room had a terrible abdominal pain of laughing so hard since we had good common sense and predicted that Carol had called his son, Carol Jr.“Lourdes, come and listen to this guy who claims he is Carol Rumie.” My grandfather finally told his wife.“Noooo, jajajaja, ‘Mono’, it is Carol Andres Rumie, your son! JAJAJA!” Lourdes cleared things out.“Aaaaah, ‘mijo’ hello.”“Pa’, is that you? I didn’t know it was you. I didn’t know you had a cell phone.”“Yeah it is me, your nephews gave it to me.”“Ah O.K. say hi to ma’, see you pa’.”
It is very funny to look at my grandfather speak on the phone, because he loses temper very quickly. Normally, he speaks two or three words on the phone, short conversations. His most frequent three words are ‘Who is this?’
I call Carol’s house to speak with Lourdes or any of the workers, rather than speaking with Carol. When you call that house, most frequently, Lourdes would answer the phone. It’s a big surprise hearing Carol’s voice answering. I remember a common Thursday about nine years ago. I was about seven years old, I was eating at my grandparent’s house, and my cousin Rodrigo was trying to reach me. He was about six years old. He dialed the number, and Carol answered the phone, and automatically, Rodrigo put the phone down, he was scared of speaking to Carol. Most of my friends, at that age, were afraid of speaking to Carol, since he is so grumpy. They felt intimidated.
Entry # 13 Carol 11
“What?!” Carol asked his son. “Meat and potatoes,” Carol Jr. answered a little clearer, but still, really difficult to understand. “She’s at ‘The Potato?” asked Carol. He had a huge confusion. “What?” Asked Carol Jr. Meanwhile, Fernando and I started laughing at the whole situation. Both Carols looked back at us wondering what we were laughing about. We cleared things out for them. My grandfather put his upper lip over his lower lip, looked at his son, and moved his head from left to right.
There was another time when both Carols misunderstood each other and assumed things quickly. This time, they’re conversation occurred on the cell phone. My brothers and I had given a cell phone as a gift to Carol Sr., since he was constantly complaining about his house phone. As soon as he received the cell phone, he complained once more, this time, about the cell phone. “Why are you giving me this @#$%? I don’t even know how to use this.”
We taught him how to use it. It was hard work, because my grandfather tried to slow his learning down. He didn’t want to make a small effort to learn and preferred to continue and complain about his 50’s house phone for the rest of his life. He refused to learn and kept on asking the same questions in attempt to make me and my brothers lose our patience and refuse teaching him. This way, he could escape having to use a cell phone. He ignored the advantage using a cell phone has.
My brothers and me didn’t lose our patience on him and figured out the little plan he had. Today, he just knows how to answer and make calls, but still, he uses the cell phone tons and every once in a while, he gives us a call. He doesn’t know how to send messages or how to respond to missed calls. “I don’t want to hear anything about those damn lost calls, missed calls, whatever you call them.” He doesn’t know how to change the ringtone or make the cell phone vibrate or play the cell phone’s games. He is not interested.
One day, the entire family was gathered after having lunch at his place. One of my brothers asked Carol for his cell phone, and activated the vibration option. Then, he gave it back to my grandfather, who put it back in his pocket and sat down. Then, Carol proceeded to tell one of his amazing stories, which are funny. In the middle of the story, my brother called Carol to his cell phone, which began to vibrate. Carol, not knowing that the cell phone had that ability, jumped off his seat as he felt the cell phone vibrate in his pocket and as he took it out he said: “Damn, this @#$% is going to explode!” He put the cell phone on a table and everyone laughed their tears out.
There was another time when both Carols misunderstood each other and assumed things quickly. This time, they’re conversation occurred on the cell phone. My brothers and I had given a cell phone as a gift to Carol Sr., since he was constantly complaining about his house phone. As soon as he received the cell phone, he complained once more, this time, about the cell phone. “Why are you giving me this @#$%? I don’t even know how to use this.”
We taught him how to use it. It was hard work, because my grandfather tried to slow his learning down. He didn’t want to make a small effort to learn and preferred to continue and complain about his 50’s house phone for the rest of his life. He refused to learn and kept on asking the same questions in attempt to make me and my brothers lose our patience and refuse teaching him. This way, he could escape having to use a cell phone. He ignored the advantage using a cell phone has.
My brothers and me didn’t lose our patience on him and figured out the little plan he had. Today, he just knows how to answer and make calls, but still, he uses the cell phone tons and every once in a while, he gives us a call. He doesn’t know how to send messages or how to respond to missed calls. “I don’t want to hear anything about those damn lost calls, missed calls, whatever you call them.” He doesn’t know how to change the ringtone or make the cell phone vibrate or play the cell phone’s games. He is not interested.
One day, the entire family was gathered after having lunch at his place. One of my brothers asked Carol for his cell phone, and activated the vibration option. Then, he gave it back to my grandfather, who put it back in his pocket and sat down. Then, Carol proceeded to tell one of his amazing stories, which are funny. In the middle of the story, my brother called Carol to his cell phone, which began to vibrate. Carol, not knowing that the cell phone had that ability, jumped off his seat as he felt the cell phone vibrate in his pocket and as he took it out he said: “Damn, this @#$% is going to explode!” He put the cell phone on a table and everyone laughed their tears out.
domingo, 9 de marzo de 2008
Entry # 12 Carol 10
The officers were pretty confused with the entire situation and how Lourdes had made a big deal out of nothing. In the other hand, my mother couldn’t avoid letting out a huge laugh.
“No ma’, it was just a joke, they aren’t taking me anywhere. Relax, relax.” “Oh! Thank God, Ruby, you almost gave me a heart attack!” Both laughed again, the officers as well. I still think they are a bit confused with what happened, but, they laughed at the end.
But their laugh was different from my mother’s laugh. They got the ‘Polite Laugh’. On the other hand, my mother got the ‘Nervous Laugh’. That is the laugh you get when you are watching a suspense movie, you are waiting for something to happen, and you are somehow very nervous. You also get that specific laugh when you get frightened by someone hiding behind a door and the guy yells “Boo!” suddenly and unexpectedly. First, you jump because of fear and then you laugh.
These events’ main cause is poor communication. There are other examples of these events that have occurred at Lourdes’ and Carol’s house. One night, Carol, Fernando my brother, Carol Jr., and I were sitting at the T.V. room watching TVEspañola. Carol Jr. is my mother’s oldest brother. He was sitting at a rocking chair beside his dad, and Fernando and I were sitting at a sofa behind them, all facing the T.V. Carol Jr. had a tray on his thighs that had his dinner plate full of meat and potatoes.
He was eating like a caveman. He put huge pieces of potatoes and meat in his mouth. Strange sounds came out of his mouth as he chewed the food down with his mouth half open. He ate as if the world was going to end the next day. For about two seconds, Carol, Fernando, and I stared directly at him, amazed. Fernando noticed, by a strange expression in my grandfather’s face, that my grandfather was not at all happy with the way Carol Jr. was eating because he couldn’t concentrate on TVEspañola. Fernando read my grandfather’s mind, and said: “He’s eating.” Just to pull Carol’s string and see if he would come up with a funny response. “He’s eating.” Carol said and nodded. Carol Jr. didn’t look at any of us and didn’t seem to know we were staring at him.
“Hey, son, where is your wife?” my grandpa added to get his son’s attention. “Meat and potatoes,” Carol Jr. answered with his mouth full of food. It was hard to understand what Carol Jr. said when he spoke normally, and this time, with his mouth full and the incoherent answer, it was hard to decipher what he tried to say. By the look on my grandfather’s face, I noticed he didn’t understand what his son had answered.
There were a few seconds where Carol just starred at Carol Jr., trying to figure out what the answer was. Fernando and I did understand what happened and what did Carol Jr. say. He was so busy eating he didn’t listen to his father’s question and didn’t mind to give a good answer. A misunderstanding had been created.
“No ma’, it was just a joke, they aren’t taking me anywhere. Relax, relax.” “Oh! Thank God, Ruby, you almost gave me a heart attack!” Both laughed again, the officers as well. I still think they are a bit confused with what happened, but, they laughed at the end.
But their laugh was different from my mother’s laugh. They got the ‘Polite Laugh’. On the other hand, my mother got the ‘Nervous Laugh’. That is the laugh you get when you are watching a suspense movie, you are waiting for something to happen, and you are somehow very nervous. You also get that specific laugh when you get frightened by someone hiding behind a door and the guy yells “Boo!” suddenly and unexpectedly. First, you jump because of fear and then you laugh.
These events’ main cause is poor communication. There are other examples of these events that have occurred at Lourdes’ and Carol’s house. One night, Carol, Fernando my brother, Carol Jr., and I were sitting at the T.V. room watching TVEspañola. Carol Jr. is my mother’s oldest brother. He was sitting at a rocking chair beside his dad, and Fernando and I were sitting at a sofa behind them, all facing the T.V. Carol Jr. had a tray on his thighs that had his dinner plate full of meat and potatoes.
He was eating like a caveman. He put huge pieces of potatoes and meat in his mouth. Strange sounds came out of his mouth as he chewed the food down with his mouth half open. He ate as if the world was going to end the next day. For about two seconds, Carol, Fernando, and I stared directly at him, amazed. Fernando noticed, by a strange expression in my grandfather’s face, that my grandfather was not at all happy with the way Carol Jr. was eating because he couldn’t concentrate on TVEspañola. Fernando read my grandfather’s mind, and said: “He’s eating.” Just to pull Carol’s string and see if he would come up with a funny response. “He’s eating.” Carol said and nodded. Carol Jr. didn’t look at any of us and didn’t seem to know we were staring at him.
“Hey, son, where is your wife?” my grandpa added to get his son’s attention. “Meat and potatoes,” Carol Jr. answered with his mouth full of food. It was hard to understand what Carol Jr. said when he spoke normally, and this time, with his mouth full and the incoherent answer, it was hard to decipher what he tried to say. By the look on my grandfather’s face, I noticed he didn’t understand what his son had answered.
There were a few seconds where Carol just starred at Carol Jr., trying to figure out what the answer was. Fernando and I did understand what happened and what did Carol Jr. say. He was so busy eating he didn’t listen to his father’s question and didn’t mind to give a good answer. A misunderstanding had been created.
Entry # 11 Carol 9
She came close to the scene, but, the officers send her away fast. “Stay away! Don’t come any closer.” Even though she said she knew Lourdes, they send her off. Then Ana called Luis Ernesto, my oldest brother. “Hey! Two officers have Lourdes outside her house with her arms up! They think Hannibal has broken into the house and have hostages and want to rob Lourdes’ money! Come here quick and try to help!”
Those types of events, extraordinary, can only occur at my grandparent’s house. It was amazing what a big coincidence everything had been. I mean, what are the probabilities for two officers to misinterpret my grandma’s words the way they did? What are the chances that that happened to Lourdes, the most paranoid and sweet lady on Earth? It was incredible to see how the event had turned out. I mean, who could imagine? What were the chances that Ana Judith was walking by at that precise moment? This is a true story, I did not make it up, I do not have a creative mind as my grandpa Carol.
This event is so rare and funny that it reminds me of a comedy show called ‘Seinfeld’. I’m a lover of ‘Seinfeld’. The show is wonderfully funny because of how unique, odd, weird, and particular each character is. They all have a particularity and crazy customs. They are all maniacs. They always create confusions with a simple thing that happened, all characters get involved in the confusion and it makes a big mess.
There was another situation involving police officers and my grandma. This time, my mother was involved as well. At the entrance of my grandparent’s there are two parking lot spaces. There is a small roof over the parking spaces. When it rains, pedestrians walking near their house decide to stop and rest below the roof to avoid getting wet.
One day, two police officers were driving their bike and it was raining, they decided to rest under my grandparent’s entrance roof. A little later, my mother was going to visit my grandma and was parking her car at the parking space below the roof, beside the two officers. Simultaneously as my ma’ stepped out of the car; Lourdes opened her house door and saw two officers looking at my mother as she stepped out of the car. Lourdes and her creative paranoid mind imagined the officers were there to interrogate my mother or to put a ticket or something of that type.
“What did she do officers?” Lourdes asked, and before the officers could answer, my mother answered: “They’re taking me ma’, can you believe it?” Lourdes is the most innocent creature on Earth, and she bought my mother’s story. Lourdes got on her knees and begged the officers not to take my mother. “No! Officers please don’t take her, I swear she is a good lady, don’t take her, I will take care of her if it is necessary!”
The officers were pretty confused with the entire situation and how Lourdes had made a big deal out of nothing. In the other hand, my mother couldn’t avoid letting out a huge laugh. A nervous laugh.
Those types of events, extraordinary, can only occur at my grandparent’s house. It was amazing what a big coincidence everything had been. I mean, what are the probabilities for two officers to misinterpret my grandma’s words the way they did? What are the chances that that happened to Lourdes, the most paranoid and sweet lady on Earth? It was incredible to see how the event had turned out. I mean, who could imagine? What were the chances that Ana Judith was walking by at that precise moment? This is a true story, I did not make it up, I do not have a creative mind as my grandpa Carol.
This event is so rare and funny that it reminds me of a comedy show called ‘Seinfeld’. I’m a lover of ‘Seinfeld’. The show is wonderfully funny because of how unique, odd, weird, and particular each character is. They all have a particularity and crazy customs. They are all maniacs. They always create confusions with a simple thing that happened, all characters get involved in the confusion and it makes a big mess.
There was another situation involving police officers and my grandma. This time, my mother was involved as well. At the entrance of my grandparent’s there are two parking lot spaces. There is a small roof over the parking spaces. When it rains, pedestrians walking near their house decide to stop and rest below the roof to avoid getting wet.
One day, two police officers were driving their bike and it was raining, they decided to rest under my grandparent’s entrance roof. A little later, my mother was going to visit my grandma and was parking her car at the parking space below the roof, beside the two officers. Simultaneously as my ma’ stepped out of the car; Lourdes opened her house door and saw two officers looking at my mother as she stepped out of the car. Lourdes and her creative paranoid mind imagined the officers were there to interrogate my mother or to put a ticket or something of that type.
“What did she do officers?” Lourdes asked, and before the officers could answer, my mother answered: “They’re taking me ma’, can you believe it?” Lourdes is the most innocent creature on Earth, and she bought my mother’s story. Lourdes got on her knees and begged the officers not to take my mother. “No! Officers please don’t take her, I swear she is a good lady, don’t take her, I will take care of her if it is necessary!”
The officers were pretty confused with the entire situation and how Lourdes had made a big deal out of nothing. In the other hand, my mother couldn’t avoid letting out a huge laugh. A nervous laugh.
Entry # 10 Carol 8
My grandfather’s capacity to come up with very elaborate, detailed, and creative answers in just a second is amazing. It would take someone hours to come up with such an answer, but for Carol, it is plain instinct, a reflex. He always surprises everyone. That’s why I do those types of questions. You see, Carol is like those type of toys that have a string, and when you pull it, they talk to you, or make a little dance, or laugh, anything. Asking Carol those questions would be the same as pulling his string.
A few years ago, my grandparents had not hired Hannibal to guard the house, and burglars broke into the house. They tied both of my grandparents to a chair, tied they’re workers, and stole precious objects they had. They stole a wrist watch collection my grandfather owned and several jewelries my grandmother owned. Both my grandparents were shocked by that robbery. They are both hugely paranoid and that is why they decided to hire Hannibal. Since then, no more robberies have occurred, but a very strange incident happened.
One day, there was a police motorcycle with two policemen, riding around the city just to check things out. By coincidence, they passed in front of my grandmother’s house right in the moment that Hannibal was helping her get inside her house. The policemen observed Hannibal’s physical aspect, and they believed he was a robber who had forced Lourdes inside. Both policemen got of the bike and ran towards the house, took their guns out and rang the bell. Lourdes, who had a few seconds ago entered and is the most paranoid lady in Earth, opened the door.
“Yes, officers, is there something wrong? How can I help you?” “Lady! Put your hands up! Don’t worry; we will get that burglar out.” “What? What burglar, do I have a burglar in my house? Oh my God!” Lourdes was about to faint. “Yes, lady that guy that opened the door.” The policemen said. “Oh, no, no, no, that is a worker of mine; you don’t have to worry about that.” Lourdes tried to explain things to the policemen, but, unfortunately, they didn’t believe her. They thought Hannibal had threatened her to tell the policemen that everything was fine, so that the policemen would go away. “Put your hands up lady! We will take care of it!”
Rosiris, one of my grandmother’s maids, saw how the officers didn’t believe Lourdes for much she explained. She went running upstairs to find Carol, so that he could explain the situation to the policemen. She enters the room and finds Carol without his shirt on watching T.V. She tells him the story with a lot of nervousness and panic. Suddenly, Carol responds: “Its fine, tell them to take her! That would be the best they could do! I’m not going downstairs.”
At the same time, a paternal cousin who lived next door to Lourdes, Ana Judith, was walking by. She saw the whole scene and couldn’t believe it. Two armed officers were aiming at my grandmother who was pale as snow and had her arms risen as high as she could. Ana Judith knew there had to be some type of misunderstanding.
A few years ago, my grandparents had not hired Hannibal to guard the house, and burglars broke into the house. They tied both of my grandparents to a chair, tied they’re workers, and stole precious objects they had. They stole a wrist watch collection my grandfather owned and several jewelries my grandmother owned. Both my grandparents were shocked by that robbery. They are both hugely paranoid and that is why they decided to hire Hannibal. Since then, no more robberies have occurred, but a very strange incident happened.
One day, there was a police motorcycle with two policemen, riding around the city just to check things out. By coincidence, they passed in front of my grandmother’s house right in the moment that Hannibal was helping her get inside her house. The policemen observed Hannibal’s physical aspect, and they believed he was a robber who had forced Lourdes inside. Both policemen got of the bike and ran towards the house, took their guns out and rang the bell. Lourdes, who had a few seconds ago entered and is the most paranoid lady in Earth, opened the door.
“Yes, officers, is there something wrong? How can I help you?” “Lady! Put your hands up! Don’t worry; we will get that burglar out.” “What? What burglar, do I have a burglar in my house? Oh my God!” Lourdes was about to faint. “Yes, lady that guy that opened the door.” The policemen said. “Oh, no, no, no, that is a worker of mine; you don’t have to worry about that.” Lourdes tried to explain things to the policemen, but, unfortunately, they didn’t believe her. They thought Hannibal had threatened her to tell the policemen that everything was fine, so that the policemen would go away. “Put your hands up lady! We will take care of it!”
Rosiris, one of my grandmother’s maids, saw how the officers didn’t believe Lourdes for much she explained. She went running upstairs to find Carol, so that he could explain the situation to the policemen. She enters the room and finds Carol without his shirt on watching T.V. She tells him the story with a lot of nervousness and panic. Suddenly, Carol responds: “Its fine, tell them to take her! That would be the best they could do! I’m not going downstairs.”
At the same time, a paternal cousin who lived next door to Lourdes, Ana Judith, was walking by. She saw the whole scene and couldn’t believe it. Two armed officers were aiming at my grandmother who was pale as snow and had her arms risen as high as she could. Ana Judith knew there had to be some type of misunderstanding.
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