Entry # 4 Carol 3

His stories always have some kind of atrocity, barbarity, nonsense, disparate, which makes them greatly humorous. He loves fights, gossips, indignity, and scandals. He loves when I get near him and tell him a story about a fight or a big scandal that might be caused by a gossip.
After he is done with the newspaper, Carol goes back upstairs, and takes a bath. His bathroom has the coldest water in the entire country. Carol and his wife, I suppose have become immune to it. They no longer feel how cold it is. They have lost sensitivity. I have tried bathing there, and it is a complete, difficult, and complicated task. It requires skill, agility (neither Carol nor Lourdes have it), and a whole lot of strength. Yes, lots of strength to resist the cold water from burning your skin or freezing you to death! Carol and Lourdes have mastered the trick, and do not see the cold water as a problem as I would.
He bathes and does whatever else he has to do, and then picks up the phone and asks the Taxi Company to send him a cab. He no longer needs to give his name or address since the operators who answer the phones recognize his voice and know where he lives and everything.
Cab drivers compete for being the one who gets to pick my grandfather up. He always makes them laugh. Since Carol is really tall and has long legs, it is hard for him to find a cab with enough space for his body to fit comfortably. The cab drivers try to make the cab as comfortable as possible for him. They pull the front seat as far back to give Carol the most amount of space. Normally, he gets picked up by a Renault Clio, a small sized car. As he gets in, he says: “Damn it! Why do these stupid people keep making smaller and smaller cars?! It is impossible for me to be comfortable in here! Damned life I have!” The cab drivers just laugh and say: “This old guy is something special.” As they drive him to his nephew’s office, where he goes every day to visit, he always warns them about wholes on the street. He gets horribly nervous when the car is moving; and when he gets nervous, he does nothing else than curse and get mad.
“Be careful! Watch that hole over there! It’s a crater! The whole damn car could fit in there! Drive like a human, not like a chimpanzee! You are going to get us both killed! This city is not worth anything! All the streets are filled with holes, the mayor does nothing to fix them, and he just steals everyone’s money! Damn it! Watch that motorcycle/taxi over there! Can’t you see that the driver is a gorilla? In fact, a gorilla would drive better. Understand? Look at him! He’s a complete ignorant! Knows nothing about traffic signals, in fact, knows nothing about anything! Watch out! Keep your distance! Look at that motorcycle/taxi over there; he’s carrying an amazingly fat lady with a cake on her hands at the back of the motorcycle. I bet you a thousand dollars that they will both get killed. Be careful and wary or you’ll be the one that kills them! Yes, yes, I’ve told you a thousand times these motorcycle drivers are all gorillas. Watch out with the pedestrian! You almost hit him! Don’t you know about the Cartagena’s pedestrians’ favorite custom and hobby? I’ve got no idea why, but they love jumping in front of cars so that they get killed! Yes, I worked at the hospital, and I had tons of cases with hit pedestrians by taxis. People here in Cartagena are mad! Didn’t I tell you this is total chaos? Everyone acts as if they were drunk and drugged chimpanzees.”